Smules.

This morning I acted out and almost felt a wave of empowerment wash over my disobedient face until it occurred to me that by "acting out" I had simply taken part in what every self-serving human does every day.  Dare I had done something common? 

Check out time at Walmart with an embarrassing assortment of things that must have been the root of the "one of these things just doesn't belong here....." song from Sesame Street, I went through the 20 Items or Less! without taking numeric stock of my wares.  At 8am, for some reason the Walmart was silent and I took that line.  I was glad I took it.  The more the cashier stared at me, then at my items, then back at me to clearly indicate the inner dialogue of "Oh fuck off with her, didn't she see the sign?  Can't she read it?" made my eyes light up more and more. 

Becoming more giddy by the moment and watching the clerk mute herself, I replied in kind to her mental beams, hoping we would forge a conversation alien style.


"Of course I can read it.  Not only did I see the sign, but I read it and felt an extra shove towards you because it has an exclamation point after 'Less!'  Walmart really wants me to get the point and take this line seriously, and yet I here I am... with more than 20.  On.  Purpose.  Ring me up please.  Mm-hm, ring ring"  Chirped I through cheerful closed lips and gestured a wave towards the items.  Of course I had noticed the sign, I had deliberately decided to disobey it.

Then an older, fuck it.... elderly and idle woman - the type who beg for eye contact and perceive it as an invitation for chat - by then meandered up with all the items I should have been buying and ultimately in time will have to as a result of giving in to tasty goods, remarking to the cashier that she was very fast.  More glee when the cashier flicked her eyes onto me one last time and said "Yeah, I have to be."

 After bopping to my car I ran a .... what would you call it?  Pink?  Stoplight.  Red and yellow halfway isn't pink and I'm not one to be found in pink zones often enough to know but I think that's what they're called.  A pink!  On. Purpose!  I knew it was going to pink on me and both Metro and I skirted the turn like bank robbers with bags of cash.


So... heh, sure my version of acting out is barely noticeable to qualify.  It's just what people do.   I'm either overly concerned about inconveniencing others or am against rule breaking to a level of boring reserved for librarians.  Maybe both as I don't like to be inconvenienced by people breaking the rules, and know why?  Because they god-damned get away with it.  And they do it because it feels goooood! 


- DM