Go go gadget legs
Know how you can tell a true pal? They give you gifts and manage not to tell you about it beforehand. The stuff just shows up. Saffy gifted me. Here is my open letter and update for you all to Saffy:
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You fucking crotch! On so many levels of being the most delightful of all fucking crotches, this ... you are. (also a GREAT indication of a true-blue friend because when else is it ever ok to greet a person or start a sentence like that? I doubt she thought a single thing of it, and maybe even got happy that her package had arrived).
I've not opened it.
I got yelled at for it. Mr. Morgan signed and flew into the houes screeching that I was warned to "stop the god damned spending!" Lol, because the box said Mary Kay and there is no difference to him from that to my Avon gig.
So it was trouble but short lived and he felt stupid. I cannot believe you spent that much on postage. We both stared at Mary's box in awe. So that's why it's not open. I'm waiting one minute for every soul sucking dollar they raped you for.
Secondly I GOT A JOB! A real one! A decent paying one working in the most lovely Victorian house in the old district of town. My god this house is ...... lol I'll have to write it out much more in detail for you and perhaps snap a few photos. It's amazing, vintage and even has a wooden spiral staircase for me to fall down from, which we know I will.
It's the holistic medicine practice, very small, very cozy and hippy-like. They do acupuncture and herbal remedies, treatment things that really is pretty fucking cool. One of the doctors herself interviewed me and I knew she liked me without know quite "why", not an uncommon thing when it comes to me I guess. But alas, the hippy folk are indeed kindreds and have welcomed me into their fold like the lost little lamb I was. DM love..... finally! She said they thought I was funny (another ABOUT TIME, I really am ya know... funny if you unclench for a second) and that they felt I would be a perfect addition to the staff. /melts, melts...... how long I've waited for someone to say something, ANYTHING nice about me.
No benefits persay, as in no normal ones. All the free yoga, acupunture and herbs I want. At first I thought what a cheapy, but that's not it at all. She truly believes in alternative healing and if she contributed to western medicine by paying me for those doctors, it would upset everything she is about. Not what my cripple hands need, but .... I applaud standing by your convictions and not being sorry for it.
That's my update and just to make a perfect day better..... the box. It's sitting there. Blinking. In neon.
I have many more things to share, but one epic at a time. For now let's do a butt wiggle dance about my getting not only a job, but one I wanted. Irony is, I had two calls for interviews by the time I came home. God thinks he's funny, and maybe to some extent he is.
Love you and thank you for mystery box.
- DM
So I waited that time period, as promised because I'm a faithful friend back at her, and it was Gary in the box! Gary has been talked about for many months, maybe encroaching on a year of the Garyish tease. He..... does stuff.
Gary is an extremely talented raffe. I think she got him cheap off the black market animal circuit, a rescue raffe! I don't normally look like the above photo, actually quite the opposite and somewhat squinty or pissy looking but throw a present at me at it's fucking Christmas for a two year old eyes lighting up sort of beam.
Awesome and great song timing, today was a long overdue and much needed day of delight.
-DM
-----
You fucking crotch! On so many levels of being the most delightful of all fucking crotches, this ... you are. (also a GREAT indication of a true-blue friend because when else is it ever ok to greet a person or start a sentence like that? I doubt she thought a single thing of it, and maybe even got happy that her package had arrived).
I've not opened it.
I got yelled at for it. Mr. Morgan signed and flew into the houes screeching that I was warned to "stop the god damned spending!" Lol, because the box said Mary Kay and there is no difference to him from that to my Avon gig.
So it was trouble but short lived and he felt stupid. I cannot believe you spent that much on postage. We both stared at Mary's box in awe. So that's why it's not open. I'm waiting one minute for every soul sucking dollar they raped you for.
Secondly I GOT A JOB! A real one! A decent paying one working in the most lovely Victorian house in the old district of town. My god this house is ...... lol I'll have to write it out much more in detail for you and perhaps snap a few photos. It's amazing, vintage and even has a wooden spiral staircase for me to fall down from, which we know I will.
It's the holistic medicine practice, very small, very cozy and hippy-like. They do acupuncture and herbal remedies, treatment things that really is pretty fucking cool. One of the doctors herself interviewed me and I knew she liked me without know quite "why", not an uncommon thing when it comes to me I guess. But alas, the hippy folk are indeed kindreds and have welcomed me into their fold like the lost little lamb I was. DM love..... finally! She said they thought I was funny (another ABOUT TIME, I really am ya know... funny if you unclench for a second) and that they felt I would be a perfect addition to the staff. /melts, melts...... how long I've waited for someone to say something, ANYTHING nice about me.
No benefits persay, as in no normal ones. All the free yoga, acupunture and herbs I want. At first I thought what a cheapy, but that's not it at all. She truly believes in alternative healing and if she contributed to western medicine by paying me for those doctors, it would upset everything she is about. Not what my cripple hands need, but .... I applaud standing by your convictions and not being sorry for it.
That's my update and just to make a perfect day better..... the box. It's sitting there. Blinking. In neon.
I have many more things to share, but one epic at a time. For now let's do a butt wiggle dance about my getting not only a job, but one I wanted. Irony is, I had two calls for interviews by the time I came home. God thinks he's funny, and maybe to some extent he is.
Love you and thank you for mystery box.
- DM
So I waited that time period, as promised because I'm a faithful friend back at her, and it was Gary in the box! Gary has been talked about for many months, maybe encroaching on a year of the Garyish tease. He..... does stuff.
Gary is an extremely talented raffe. I think she got him cheap off the black market animal circuit, a rescue raffe! I don't normally look like the above photo, actually quite the opposite and somewhat squinty or pissy looking but throw a present at me at it's fucking Christmas for a two year old eyes lighting up sort of beam.
Awesome and great song timing, today was a long overdue and much needed day of delight.
-DM
posted by DMorgan's Zoo at
5:01 PM
7 Comments:
EEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm telling you, Gary has been pestering me for months...STARING at me...upset because he hadn't been mailed. I have Gary's brother as Faythe fell in love with him as well. You crack me up!! Loved the letter and yes I took the crotch calling as a compliment HA! I would only take it as one from you! :)
What's Gary's brother's name? I hope he writes. I totally understand how they sit there, just staring at you all calm. You know they have something to say, but nooooo they play it off all cool and wait for their move. I've caught the sneaky bitches doing it many a time. I almost want to declare raffe asylum, it's gone past being ridiculous or even something I try to explain should a guest come over. Kinda speaks for itself... she must like those. A... lot.
TOO funny about the samples too, Just for that I'm mailing you Avon and we'll see who is better! Muaha.
Lipstick shade was spot on though, good lookin' out on that one.
YAY! I know how you enjoy the samples so I couldn't resist giving you one of everything I had lol. I love that lipstick color. How's the gloves? Sorry they didn't get there before Halloween!!
Gary's brother's name is Harry of course!
The gloves are a hoot bc I thought they were snowflakes, not bones gloves until I saw the label. We turned off the lights.... they do not glow. Should I write a letter lol?
AWESOME!!! There is no font size big enough to express my happiness for you! Just really really awesome news (im getting all teary).
And it does sound like a wonderful fit and I know you were hoping for that one if only for the house.
Congratulations dear Ms. M.
(loved your little giggle at the end of the vid.)
OH YEAH!! Because I replied with a big congrats in the email I forgot to congrats you on your new job in your comments!
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We're SOOOOOOOO happy for you!!!
(PS I don't know if the gloves are supposed to glow??)
They claim to glow. They profess glowing so heartily that no one could possibly miss seeing your child. I like them anyhow, very very many.
And ty to all for the woot woots, I'm mildly nervous.... kinda? Mostly because I smoke and it's probably not a good idea there. I've got some stupid gum around here somewhere and a lunch box raring to go.
Been a long long journey, I hope to fucking god it works out.
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