Do your job! That means YOU!

I had a decent office prank planned, but I de-pranked by default because I pranked before the prank. I seemingly have over pranked so can’t pull off the original idea. I have a pretty good idea that I can still pull it regardless of the unexpected pre-prank.

We will have to see the mood and possible freak out of the pranked first. It’s just an office goof, no need for freak outs but it very well could happen given the prankee. To be honest, it keeps me from throwing myself into traffic.… I NEED to goof on people. That's what office workers do.

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So this morning our Grand Master was slighted a biscuit in his McDonald’s. To boot they gave him the jelly, as if to mock. I asked for the receipt and said I’d write, even though my last writing scored nothing more than an OK basically. I have faith Mc’Ds will be better. But not much.

Dear Ronald,

I recently purchased the Big Breakfast on the speedtrain we call a commute for the standard worker. Being in a hurry I trusted the employees to be certain all of my items were in the package, and didn’t check it as I had five minutes left to be to work on time without consequenses.

My meal was missing the biscuit, but there was no lack of jelly to mock it being absent, as though I could hope to find a biscuit in there and I looked with great anticipation. What am I to do with jelly and no bisquit? Should I keep ordering and hope it arrives and double jelly it? Is this a bisquit pyramid scam?

While not trying to squabble over a biscuit, I work a very long day and my morning meal is what gets me by without a low sugar seizure, more so, I expect to eat what I have paid for. My job does not allow the time to return to the restaurant for a complaint or biscuit beg, but I do feel owed that biscuit as a loyal customer and advocate to your food, I did not have time to check the drive through bag, I simply had faith that your employees would understand what the order entailed, and fill it appropriately. I have enclosed my receipt as proof of my breakfast expectations, and ultimate disappointment. Frankly, I'm not lovin' it.

I have great trust Ronald that you will do the right thing and replace my biscuit, I have seen you on the television and you seem very eager to please. I appreciate and anticipate your response.

To Grand Master.... you're welcome. We shall see. Getting rather annoyed at writing for a missing item, but ya know.... it IS McDonald's, I doubt they give a fuck and probably overlooked it after the illegal alien raids at local McD's on Thursday. I read in the paper today that some of the franchised chains closed just by hearing immigration was making local fast food sweeps. Crazy shit.

Who knows though.... mailed on Monday fucker.

-DM